Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Status of Male Stripper Memoir

My second book, a memoir of when I first started stripping during college, is coming along nicely. I'm about 80% done with it, and will once again enlist the talented Kelly Luce (visit her page) to edit it.

The memoir will cover a broad range of exciting events I encountered on the job such as:

- My transformation from nerd to male stripper
- Competing with other male dancers for bookings
- Relationship vs. job conflicts
- Threesomes and more
- Cuckolds and Swingers
- Working at a gay club
- Cheating brides/girlfriends
- Other fucked-up male strippers
- Dating an angry virgin who hated my job
- Spiteful men who wanted to kill me
- Jealous friends
- Double standards
- how being a male stripper benefited me for the job market
- and many candid photos from my personal collection

The memoir is scheduled to be released in spring of this year, so keep an eye out for updates!

Thursday, January 15, 2015

A Crazy Start to 2015

Taking off the cop uniform.
Under normal circumstances, January often drudges along without any bachelorette parties in my region. Everyone spent the holidays celebrating and find themselves returning to their normal work lives.

That was a good thing, too. I threw out my back a few weeks ago and had to go to the hospital. Out of all the times to have an injury, December and January were the most ideal since I wouldn’t have to work … Or so I had thought.

This year brought many tourists eager to thrust dollar bills into a male stripper’s G-string.

Here are the highlights from the parties of January, 2015, so far:

First Party

- The first bachelorette party was wilder than usual, touching, groping, and fondling me without reservations.

- Everyone ranged from ages 18 to 24.

- My back was bothering a bit at this party, even hampering my movements, but the fervor of the crowd made me forget about it sometimes.

- I was able to get some pics and videos as you can see.

- I stripped completely nude based on the girls unanimously voting to see my penis.

- One girl said, “I hope this doesn’t offend you, but I gotta say it … Asian, big dick!”

- I kissed an 18-year-old girl and exchanged phone numbers with her. A college freshman.

Second Party

- Women ranged in the late 20’s to 50’s.

- Everyone was exceptionally kind.

- I earned $300 from this gig.

- It was exceptionally cold (for the South) on this night. Usually I strip in the spring, summer, or fall where it’s warm in the very least. This time I wore a jacket and gloves with my costume to keep from freezing.

- A few single girls lingered around to talk with me.

- I left early instead of stayed. I’m 33 years old and been working all week—no longer 21 with a deep pool of energy. I needed some time to relax at home.

Third Party

- Bride was a virgin and extremely shy. Other girls warned me that she might not accept the idea of a male stripper. She turned red just by my very presence, and it took a very conservative and careful approach just to avoid scaring her to death.

- Three sisters of the bride’s future husband were present. The bride admitted that she was afraid of getting in trouble with them by interacting with me.

- Two of the sisters were single and insisted that the bride have a good time with me. One sister said, “Look at his body. Our brother looks nothing like this! Come on—feel those abs, grab that ass!”

- One sister mentioned, “Can you believe that she never had sex with the groom? Why buy a car before test-driving it?”

- While I lay down on couch, the girls sprayed whipped cream all over my body—including my abs, neck, chest, inner thighs, and even my crotch area—and licked it off like a litter of kittens attacking a milk dish.

- Eventually the bride relaxes.

- Several girls demanded to see my penis, including the sisters and the bride. What better way to bond with your in-laws than to admire a man's dick together? I said that I would only show them if everyone agreed that it was okay. Two girls didn’t want to. They left the room, leaving half a dozen gathered together on a couch in front of me.

- Once I took my thong off, one girl muttered, “An Asian with a huge penis.” People and their stereotypes... The girls marveled as I stood before them and masturbated.

- One of the sisters, a 23 year old, stood up and approached me. Her hands caressed me all over, finally coming to rest at my cock. She grabbed it and began stroking it. She call her 18-year-old sister up to join. The 18 year old was reluctant at first, but she sauntered next to me, and began touching me too. Two sisters jerking me off; it was like a porn fantasy mixed with drunkenness. I throbbed in pleasure.

- The party ended because several girls were either sick from too much alcohol, or tired because of the late hour. They had to be out of the condo by 9 o’clock in the morning. They packed loads of food for me to take home.

- The bride and her new in-laws said they had a wonderful time. I did too!

So far, 2015 is shaping up to be a great year. I'm looking forward to the rest of it.

**WARNING: Semi-NSFW pic below**

"Hanging out" at the first party.

Saturday, January 10, 2015

The Average Income

"What's the average income for a male stripper?"

The earnings from my first 3 shows of 2015.

Guys ask me this question all the time. Some want a job to pay their way through college. Others just want a fun way to get rich. Answering this question is almost impossible for the following reasons:

1. No accountability - Strippers usually don't report the money they make since most of it comes under the table. Plus, most guys don't even keep track of what they earn throughout the year.

2. Sales ability - Stripping is a sales job, based on performance and numbers. Some of us are better at it than others. Those of us who understand sales, marketing, and customer service have an obvious advantage.

3. Work ratio - No two strippers work the same hours. Some dancers have full time professional jobs and only strip on the side, turning down many opportunities that cause schedule conflicts. Others strip as their sole source of income, thus taking every gig possible.

4. Location - The bachelorette party hotspots determine where the work is. For example, Las Vegas has more demand for male strippers than Podunk, Mississippi. 

5. Versatility - The profit margin extends to how far a guy is willing to sell himself. The stripper, himself, is a product, and the more a product can do, the more it can sell itself. Most of the time it is bachelorette private parties. Sometimes it's performing on stage. Some strippers even sell sex or do gay-4-pay porn. Men who are willing to do anything and everything have the options to make more money than those who only strip at bachelorette parties.

6. Personal Appeal - Stripping is a popularity contest. Women tend to choose the hottest guy for their parties and tip him more at male revues. No equal opportunity here.

Considering those factors, let me use an example to demonstrate why it's difficult to gauge an average income. 

Take me, for instance. I strip for mostly bachelorette parties in sparsely populated resort communities off the Emerald Coast. I do this mainly on weekends due to my full-time job during the week, turning down many shows. Therefore, I usually work 2 to 3 parties a week during the peak season and earn some extra cash, but not enough to buy a Ferrari anytime soon.

Now let's say there's a stripper named Earl in Las Vegas. In addition to bachelorette parties, he works at male revues, at gay clubs, and does one-on-one with rich clients. He doesn't have a full-time job, so he strips as his main source of income, taking any and every gig available. As a result, Earl will earn a lot more money than I will in a year's time.

One of my agents, a former male stripper, claims that his top guys make from $150,000 to $300,000 a year. However, that involves many hours of driving and a lot of events. It taxes the body after awhile.

"I know guys that drive 5 or 6 hours a day, everyday," he says. "I used to travel from 10,000 to 12,000 miles a month in my car. It was not as fun as some people would think, but I did enjoy it."

All in all, a male stripper's income depends on how much he's willing to work and how far he's willing to travel. Some guys don't like working that much, or don't want to work on the weekends. Others are absolute workaholics. The salary resembles a sales-based commission job, and no two strippers are alike.

Friday, January 2, 2015

New Year Resolutions for Male Stripper 2015

Last year, I posted the some resolutions for both aspiring and professional male strippers. This year, I will add to them:

Aspiring Male Stripper Resolutions

  • I will train to build a better body.
  • I will eat a healthy diet to attain an ideal physique.
  • I will improve my dancing abilities, even if I think I know how to dance.
  • I will groom myself and maintain the highest standards of hygiene.
  • I will start a portfolio of professional pictures of myself, so I have something to send to employers.
  • I will have my own cell phone and GPS.
  • I will have my own music player accompanied by a setlist of good dance songs.
  • I will put together at least two different costumes.
  • I will buy some sexy underwear for stripping.
  • I will contact at least three different employers for work.
  • I will listen to criticism.

Professional Male Stripper Resolutions
  • I will maintain or improve my work-out routine, diet, and physique.
  • I will practice my dance routine and look for ways to improve it.
  • I will continue to look my best, never slacking because I have achieved success.
  • I will learn to perform and speak in public, even if I think I already know how.
  • I will check out different employers to learn about other opportunities out there.
  • I will treat my current employer(s) with respect because they provide me with work.
  • I will give my customers the best service that I can.
  • I will put together another costume and/or improve the ones I already have.
  • I will create business cards and network with local limo services, party buses, event organizers, or any other possible venues that may require a male stripper.
  • I will update my portfolio if necessary.
  • I will abstain from activities and substances that are detrimental to my health and physique.
  • I will not be envious of others, nor compare myself to my peers.
  • I will be amiable, enthusiastic, and professional.
  • I will not boast, brag, or gloat about my profession.
  • I will always remember where I came from.
  • I will strive to learn other skills and knowledge in life, because I know that I cannot strip forever.

2015 Additions:

  • I will avoid poisonous people who insult me, smile upon my misfortunes, and discourage me from bettering myself. 
  • I will avoid being such a poisonous person to my peers, because such a personality will show in my work.
  • I will cultivate and/or maintain profound friendships with positive people, because these are the relationships that count once the parties are over.
  • I will evaluate my bad parties and discover new ways to satisfy customers, even if they are difficult.
  • I will count and record my earnings, even the tips down to the last dollar. I will use this information to track my personal budget, note the customer flow each month and season, and to note which parties netted the most tips so I can make the necessary adjustments for improvements. 

Monday, December 29, 2014

Worst Trend of 2014: The Lumbersexual

Back when I first started stripping in college in 2003, the metrosexual was the biggest fashion fad among male students. Even South Park covered an episode about it that same year called, "South Park Is Gay!" This wasn't exactly a bad trend for male strippers. Maximus, a fellow coworker of mine, indulged in it.

Lumbersexuality: The new trend of millenials. Image courtesy of Stockrocket/Getty Images

Since then, the metrosexuals have grown older, got married, and had kids, and decided to replace fashion with comfort. Hipsters have taken their place, populating colleges, cities, and coffee shops. Now the "Lumbersexual" has arrived, which is like a more rugged version of the metrosexual and hipster, sporting a poofy beard accompanied by a plaid shirt or suspenders.

In her detailed article, "Out of the Woods: Here He Comes: The Lumbersexual," Holly Baxter refers to them as men who carefully groom themselves, especially their beards, in an attempt to mimic the rugged outdoors look. She has a point. Big bushy beards have been cropping up everywhere with the young guys who can grow them. While that's nice and all, you may want to avoid this trend, especially if you're trying to become a male stripper.

First off, some younger girls may like the bearded lumberjack or even hipster look, but there are many others who will detest it. In the world of stripping, all women are customers, therefore the man must try to be universally appealing to as many as possible. This bearded look only attracts a niche market.

Also, male strippers often have to wear costumes that depict men of uniform. Imagine the lumbersexual type dressed in a cop uniform, or firefighter, or military uniform. These professions require men to be clean-shaven. Ever seen a drill sergeant or cop with a bushy beard? Didn't think so.

Here's another problem with the lumberjack look. It falls into the category of "trying too hard." If you have to go out of your way to show off your manliness, then chances are you're not that manly. Spending extra time trimming and manicuring your beard is tantamount to the metrosexual guy who spends that much time styling his hair with gel.

While it's nice that the lumbersexual wants to look more rugged and manly than his metrosexual and hipster counterparts, there's already a group of outdoors men who have been doing that for a while now. They're called rednecks.

Here's my advice. Grow a beard only if it looks good on you, or to hide your double-chin or lack of jawline. These excessively bushy beards aren't appealing to employers. Personally, I'll keep mine shaved. The last thing I need is to give a girl's breasts carpet burn when I'm fishing a dollar out from her bra with my teeth.